What Is Love? (No, Really Though)

I wrote about love last year.

And honestly? I sounded like such a scholar — a theologian just looking at the text at face value. Lol.

That’s the thing about growth — the Holy Spirit doesn’t give you everything at once. He gives you more as you go. The funniest thing is I said it myself in my first blog about love — “I’m sure there’s more to love to explore.”

Oh boy. Was I right. I have so much more to say but I don’t want this to sound like a sermon. I’ll try to highlight my points.

First, Let’s Agree on the Foundation

Before we go anywhere, we need to settle something.

If we’re going to love like God loves, we have to understand how God defines love. Not through the lens of culture. Not our past experiences. Not our emotions. Not even our parents — and I say that with full respect, not to dishonor them, but because they are human. They fall short. And not everyone who raised us has studied the Word of God to understand what love actually is.

The Word is the foundation.

We can experience love through people. But if we want to walk in it — truly — we have to study Scripture.

Because here’s the truth:

Whenever your definition of love becomes distorted, your expression of love becomes distorted too.

Read that again.

Now let’s look at what love actually looks like.

Love Is Compassion

One of my favorite moments in the entire Bible is when Jesus encountered a widow whose only son had just died (Luke 7:11–15).

Here’s what gets me every time. She never asked for a miracle or prayed a special prayer.

Jesus just saw her. He saw her pain. And He was moved with compassion — then He raised her son from the dead.

Another example — God looked at all of humanity, trapped, broken, dead in sin, and decided to do something about it.

“For God so loved the world that He gave His only Son.” (John 3:16)

Out of compassion, He gave His Son to die.

And because we’ve received that compassion, we’re supposed to give it:

“But if anyone has the world’s goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God’s love abide in him?” (1 John 3:17)

Sometimes compassion looks like giving money. Sometimes it looks like helping someone move. And sometimes — all you have is a prayer, an encouraging text, or a listening ear.

Don’t underestimate how we can express compassion. It matters more than you know.

Love Is Sacrifice

Let’s be honest.

Most of us like love until it costs us something. Then suddenly it gets complicated. But biblical love has always been sacrificial. God didn’t just tell us He loved us — He proved it. Jesus gave up comfort and ultimately His life for people who had done absolutely nothing to deserve it.

I believe that’s the context and basis behind:

“Love your enemies.” (Matthew 5:44)

Not your friends. Not the people who agree with you. Not the people who think like you.

Your enemies.

Love requires sacrifice. And real sacrifice means dying to self. It takes truly dying to self to love your enemies — and that is truly a sacrifice.

It means sometimes you don’t get the last word.

Sometimes you forgive first, even when you’re still hurting.

Sometimes you choose peace over being right.

Sometimes it’s sacrificing your last penny for someone’s need.

Love isn’t always convenient. But neither was the cross.

Love Is Unconditional — But Let’s Be Clear About What That Means

“But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:8)

We did nothing to earn it. Nothing to deserve it.

God loves saints and sinners alike. He desires that all people come to repentance and be saved.

But — and this is important — unconditional love does not mean unconditional approval.

God loves everyone. He does not trust everyone.

The same is true for us. We are called to love everyone. We are not called to unite ourselves with everyone. Love does not require unhealthy partnerships, ungodly alliances, or compromising godly values.

God loves without condition. But He maintains His holiness. And so should we.

Love Is Patient

“Love is patient, love is kind…” (1 Corinthians 13:4). God’s patience is literally an expression of His love.

“The Lord is not slow in keeping His promise… but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance.” (2 Peter 3:9)

He is patient — giving people time. Time to repent . Time to grow.

Romans 2:4 teaches that it’s God’s kindness, patience, and forbearance that are meant to lead us to repentance — not His wrath.

But patience does not mean compromise.

God was patient with Israel for decades while they wandered in their rebellion — but He never changed His standards. He never said “okay fine, it doesn’t matter.” He was patient before He responded.

We are called to be patient with people as they grow in Christ, but not to tolerate sin.

Love Is Mercy

Here’s the raw truth:

None of us want justice when it comes to our own mistakes.

We want mercy.

Mercy is God not giving us what we deserve. And if you’re honest — every single one of us has benefited from it more times than we can count.

Israel rebelled against God over and over again. And over and over again, God extended mercy. Not because He ignored sin. Not because He approved of it. But because He loved His people.

“Because of His great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy…” (Ephesians 2:4)

Did you catch that? Love was the motive. Mercy was the response.

Now here’s where people get it twisted — mercy doesn’t mean God excuses the sin.

Think about David. He committed adultery AND murder — both sins that, under the law, required death. But when David repented, God in His mercy didn’t give him death. One of the consequences? The first child conceived died. That’s real. That’s still painful. But God restored him and gave him Solomon.

Mercy doesn’t mean no consequence.

Mercy just means you don’t get what you fully deserve.

Mercy is meant to draw us closer to God — not give us a license to keep sinning. And because we’ve received mercy, we’re called to extend it. Even when people don’t deserve it. Especially then.

Love Is Truth

This might be the most unpopular thing I say today.

We’ve somehow convinced ourselves that love means never confronting, never correcting, never saying the hard thing. We call it being “kind.” We call it “not judging.” But what we’re actually doing is being cowardly and calling it love.

“Love rejoices with the truth.” (1 Corinthians 13:6)

The Holy Spirit is called the Spirit of Truth. Jesus called Himself the Truth. Truth is not the enemy of love — it’s part of love.

Here’s a real scenario. You walk out of the house. Your friend notices your pants are badly stained — embarrassingly so. She says nothing because she doesn’t want to make things awkward. You go out looking ridiculous. Was that love? Or was it fear of confrontation dressed up as kindness?

The friend who says “hey — you need to change” — yeah, that’s uncomfortable. But that’s the one who actually loves you.

Paul corrected the church in Corinth — hard — because he loved them. “I am not writing these things to shame you, but to admonish you as my beloved children.” (1 Corinthians 4:14)

Sometimes truth sounds like encouragement. And sometimes it stings.

Love Is Justice

This is the dimension of love we don’t talk about nearly enough.

Love doesn’t just care about people.

Love protects people.

Love defends people.

Love speaks up for people who can’t speak for themselves.

“Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute.” (Proverbs 31:8)

Justice is love in action.

Think about it — if God never judged evil, would that actually be loving? If He just ignored abuse, corruption, and oppression and said “it’s fine” — would that be love? Of course not.

Love hates evil. That’s why God’s justice flows directly from His love.

Even when God judged Israel to go into captivity for 70 years (Jeremiah 29:10), His goal wasn’t destruction. The judgment was to bring purification and restoration. His heart was always to bring them back to Himself.

Justice is rooted in love.

Love Is Discipline

Nobody wants to hear this one. I don’t either, honestly.

But Hebrews says:

“The Lord disciplines those He loves.” (Hebrews 12:6)

Notice it doesn’t say He disciplines those He hates. He disciplines those He loves.

A loving parent corrects their child.

A loving mentor doesn’t just tell you what you want to hear.

And a loving God corrects too.

God’s correction is not rejection. It is proof He loves you . Discipline isn’t about punishment — it’s about transformation. God loves you too much to leave you doing wrong. So instead of staying in guilt and self-pity, let’s learn to embrace the discipline.

Love Is Obedience

One of the most uncomfortable things Jesus ever said:

“If you love Me, keep My commandments.” (John 14:15)

That verse pulls love out of the realm of feelings and drops it into the realm of action.

It is absolutely possible to sing worship songs and still live in disobedience. It’s possible to talk about loving God while ignoring everything He says.

Jesus wasn’t looking for lip service.

The parable of the two sons shows us this clearly — one said yes but never followed through, the other said no but ended up doing it. Jesus asked which one honored their father. The answer? The one who actually did it. Love isn’t proven by what we say. Love is proven by what we do.

Love Is Grace

Grace is another expression of God’s love.

Jesus was described as being “full of grace and truth” (John 1:14). I like to describe grace as unmerited favor.

“For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God.” (Ephesians 2:8–9)

Salvation itself is a gift of grace: that same grace empowers us to live the Christian life — it is divine enablement.

As we grow in relationship with God, we grow in grace. His grace strengthens us, sustains us, and helps us walk victoriously. Tell me if that’s not love!

The Part We Can’t Miss

Here’s what stands out to me most after going through all of this.

Every single dimension of God’s love works together.

• His mercy never cancels His truth.

• His grace never cancels His discipline.

• His compassion never cancels His justice.

• His patience never cancels His standards.

  
  

God never compromises His principles in the name of love. And neither should we.

The more I study Scripture, the more convinced I am that real love isn’t choosing one of these dimensions and ignoring the rest. It’s embracing all of them — even the uncomfortable ones.

🎵 Musics Time

Check out “He Is Enough” by Kaestrings. 🎶🙏