Spiritual Surgery: The Healing Heart - When God Heals From The Inside Out

You know, in another life, I really thought I was going to be a psychologist or therapist. I’ve always been fascinated by the mental well-being of people—how we think, process pain, and ultimately, how we heal. But I guess God had other plans for me. Or maybe, just maybe, He’ll still use me in that way someday. Either way, one thing I know for sure: God cares about the wholeness of people.

Today, I want to talk about how to heal well—not just patching things up on the surface, but truly, deeply, and spiritually healing in a way that brings lasting transformation. And I want to take you on a journey through both my lukewarm days and my surrendered life to God because, trust me, the contrast is night and day.

Healing in My Lukewarm Days: Surface-Level Patching

I was never a serial dater (in fact, I can count the number of men I’ve dated on one hand), but it didn't mean I was exempt from heartache. The first real experience with emotional pain happened when I was extremely young. Too young. Yep, I jumped the gun!

You know that verse in the Bible by the wisest man? “Do not awaken love before its time” (Song of Solomon 8:4). Yeah… I awakened love way before its time, and I suffered for it.

At a young age, I loved deeply but unwisely. I made a terrible decision—one that hurt both me and the other person. And because I cannot lie or pretend to the people I love, I confessed. That confession shattered my heart. I longed for forgiveness, but at the time, it was unforgivable to them. The pain was unbearable, and I felt isolated because, let’s be real, who was I going to tell? I was way too young to even be in a relationship, so I suffered in silence.

That experience changed how I approached relationships. I became extra careful—not just with my own heart, but with the hearts of others.

Fast forward ten years later, another heartbreak hit me—this time, it was deception and betrayal. Those kinds of heartbreaks are the worst because they blindside you. I tried for months to reconcile, but every attempt ended in rejection. It was heavy.

So what did I do? I turned to coping mechanisms.

• I started working out religiously (which, to be fair, was a good thing).

• I also prayed for the person who hurt me, and after a while, I felt some peace.

• I distracted myself, hoping time would heal me.

But something was still missing. To some extent, these things did help.

I had healed halfheartedly —but I hadn’t healed completely.

Why?

Because I hadn’t surrendered my wounds to God. My soul was still carrying childhood traumas, insecurities, and unspoken fears. And the enemy? He was still preying and feeding on those wounds, using them to fuel on insecurities and fears in my life.

“Unhealed wounds don’t disappear. They follow you.”

I thought I was healed because I could function. But I wasn’t free.

The truth?

Sometimes, the defense mechanisms we create to “protect” ourselves are actually just prison walls keeping us in bondage.

Let that sink in.

But Let God Heal you!

Healing the Godly Way: Deep, Lasting, and Transformative

Five years later, I experienced the worst heartbreak of my life. The kind of pain that shakes your faith, makes you question everything and sends you into a downward spiral. This time, anxiety came knocking. Hard. But here’s where my story finally shifts—I ran straight to God.

This time, I knew this was beyond me. No distraction, no coping mechanism, no amount of time could fix what was broken inside me.

See, I thought healing meant just getting rid of the situation, but no. Healing with God is a total reconstruction. He wasn’t just fixing my heart—He was changing me.

I had to:

• Forgive people who never apologized.

• Pray for those who hurt me—even when I didn’t want to.

• Face my childhood wounds and let God rewire my mindset.

• Break Cycles – Identifying and shutting down generational strongholds in prayer.

I had to stop believing the lie that people always leave and start seeing love through God’s lens.

Most of all, I had to learn that before I could love anyone correctly, I had to love God first.

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and mind. This is the first and greatest commandment.” (Matthew 22:37-38)

God started uncovering the hidden wounds in my soul—the ones I didn’t even know were still bleeding. He made me confront them, confess them, repent of them. Because the enemy will always use unhealed pain to trap you in cycles of heartbreak, bad decisions, and doubt.

And let’s be real—sometimes, the thing that broke us wasn’t even the relationship. It was something deeper.

The First Heartbreak: Our Parents’ Unhealed Wounds

Your first heartbreak?

It probably wasn’t from a boyfriend or girlfriend—it was from your parents.

Someone once said, “A child’s first enemy is their parent’s unhealed wound.” And whew—that hit me hard.

We carry pain from childhood that follows us into adulthood. And when we don’t let God heal us, we start bleeding on people who had nothing to do with our wounds.

That’s why healing well is so important.

I had to go all the way back to the roots. I had to deal with childhood pain, generational patterns, and false beliefs about love, security, and trust. It was a process of unlearning and relearning.

Healing is a Process, Not a Quick Fix

The fruit of true healing is wholeness.

Healing the godly way isn’t just about feeling better—it’s about becoming whole.

God doesn’t just patch up wounds—He restores.

He doesn’t just take away pain—He builds you up so pain won’t break you again.

And when God heals, He heals so completely that it seems like the pain never happened.

The wounds become scars—but they don’t define you anymore.

And more than that, He equips you so that pain no longer has the same access to your heart.

• You stop letting negative emotions sit too long.

• You learn to handle pain the godly way—not through distractions or worldly methods.

• He teaches you to guard your heart—not with walls of fear, but with wisdom and discernment.

Stop Rushing, Start Healing

We live in a culture that tells us to jump from one relationship to another when we’re hurt. But that’s a trap. When you try to fill your wounds with people, you only bleed on them—and they bleed on you.

Only God can truly satisfy and heal you.

Healing well means taking time to:

• Let God fully restore you.

• Identify and break destructive patterns.

• Close the soul wounds so the enemy has no entry point.

True Healing Tips: What You Can’t Afford to Forget

If you don’t remember anything else, remember the tips on what I’ve learned about true healing:

1. Healing isn’t just about moving on—it’s about being transformed.

God didn’t just want to take away my pain. He wanted to mold me into His image.

2. God is Jehovah Rapha—the Lord who heals.

And not just physical wounds. He heals the mind, the heart, the soul—every part of us.

3. Forgiveness is a must—even when you never get an apology.

I had to forgive the people who hurt me.

4. God will make you go back and make things right.

I had to reach out to people I had hurt—even if it had been years.

Humility is required for healing. Pride will keep you in pain.

5. Healing childhood wounds is essential.

The fear of abandonment I carried? It wasn’t from relationships—it was from childhood experiences.

Unhealed childhood wounds become open doors for the enemy to attack us later.

6. You must love God first before you can truly love others.

The first commandment? Love the Lord your God with all your heart. Only then can you love others the right way.

7. The Word of God is healing.

When I started reading Scripture about God healing the brokenhearted, my perspective shifted. I wasn’t just reading—I was being transformed.

8. You cannot heal by jumping into another relationship.

This world tells you to “get over someone by getting under someone else.”

That’s a lie straight from the enemy. You cannot fill voids with people. True healing happens when you stop looking to people and start looking to God.

Healing Well Means Becoming Whole

“Guard Your Heart! “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” (Proverbs 4:23)

If your soul is wounded, your future relationships will pay the price.

Take the time. Heal well. Your future spouse, your children, and your calling are depending on your wholeness.

Don’t hand them a broken version of you.

They deserve better. You deserve better. And God?

He’s ready to heal you completely.

All you have to do is surrender.

🎶 Music Time! Let’s Talk Songs 🎶

📖 “Volume of the Book” – Moses Akoh, Greatman Takit, Theophilus Sunday

This one? Whew. It’s a cry for alignment, a reminder that God has already written our purpose. Are you walking in what’s been written about you, or just doing your own thing?

⚫⚪ “No Grey” – Jonathan McReynolds

Let’s be real—God doesn’t do lukewarm. You’re either in or out, black or white. No sitting on the fence. This song? It’s that nudge we all need—make a choice.

Turn these up. Let the lyrics hit. Let God speak. 🎧