How You Respond Matters

This topic right here? Whew. It’s a love-hate thing for me.

Some days, I’m out here responding like Jesus Himself is coaching me in real-time. Other days… I catch myself mid-response like, “Sis, who is this? “😂But through the highs and lows, one thing’s clear—God has been stretching me in this area, giving me grace even when I don’t get it all right.

How I want to respond sometimes 😅Getting saved doesn’t flip some switch that shuts off our emotions. We still feel deeply—but now we’re called to respond differently, with grace and wisdom.

Let’s talk about it

Life Be Life-ing… But So Does Growth

Sometimes life just isn’t fair. People disappoint us, say things they shouldn’t, do things that cut deep and act completely out of line. Situations  blindside us and things don’t go the way we prayed or hoped. And our emotions? Yeah… they want to take the wheel. But we can’t always react off emotions. That clap-back? That silent treatment? That stormy attitude? And if we’re not careful, we’ll end up reacting out of raw emotion instead of responding in wisdom.

That’s where God comes in. He teaches us how to pause—how to choose His way instead of our way. It’s not easy, but it’s necessary.

Because the truth is: our response matters.

You don’t have to clap back just because someone came at you sideways. You don’t have to match that energy. You don’t have to be petty to prove a point. Sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is take a deep breath, pause, and say, “God, how do You want me to respond?”

Sometimes, the wisest thing to do is just… pause. Because how you respond—not how you feel—is what reveals what’s really inside of you.

Offense Will Always Be an Option—But So Is Obedience

Being offended is easy. Staying offended? Even easier. But offense is a trap—a sneaky one. It gets you all worked up, stuck in your feelings, replaying moments in your head, planning imaginary arguments.

There’ve been times I’ve been deeply offended. Hurt in ways that made me question people’s hearts. I wanted to defend myself, say how I really felt, and even the score. But God gently reminded me…

“The anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.” – James 1:20 ( there is a difference between righteous anger and fleshly anger)

It hit me. Offense may feel justified, but it never leads to healing. It only multiplies the pain.

The world may call it foolish to let things go, to forgive, to keep showing up with love. But Scripture tells us:

“The wisdom of God is foolishness to man.” – 1 Corinthians 1:25 (paraphrased)

So yeah, to the world it looks weak. But in the Kingdom? It’s strength.

I Made a Decision—And It Changed Everything

I’ve decided: no matter what anyone does to me, their actions will never determine my love or my faithfulness. Period.

I will always choose love.

Not because it’s easy, but because it’s powerful. This world is already filled with enough hate, enough judgment, enough hardness. What we need? Is love. Real, genuine, Spirit-filled love.

Sometimes the people who offend us are just deeply wounded themselves. Now, hear me clearly: this isn’t an excuse for bad behavior—accountability still matters. But sometimes when we look a little deeper, we’ll see pain beneath the surface. And sometimes? Our love is the very thing God wants to use to break those walls down.

I know you’ve been mistreated. Overlooked. Cheated. Lied on. Choose love anyway.

I pray our love becomes so pure, so deep, so God-breathed… that it becomes our default reaction.

What If… God Has a Bigger Picture?

You ever think the very person who offended you might be the one God is calling you to impact in a powerful way?

Sometimes we miss divine assignments because we stay stuck in offense. Some of the best stories start with pain but end in restoration. God’s in the business of flipping the script.

Let’s get practical, with a Bible story.

Remember Paul? Yeah… That Paul

Let me take you to one of the wildest plot twists in the Bible.

Before Paul was the apostle we love to quote, he was Saul—a man on a mission to kill Christians. Literally. He was zealous for the law, a religious fanatic convinced he was doing good by hunting down believers. In his mind, he thought he was honoring God by silencing the followers of Jesus.

But one day, on his way to Damascus to murder more believers , he encountered the Light of God. And it blinded him—physically. Everything changed in that moment.

Now here’s where it gets crazy: the man God sent to pray for Paul and help him receive his sight back was Ananias. A man from the same community Paul was about to attack. Can you imagine the fear and confusion? Ananias was like, “Wait Lord… you want me to pray for the same man who’s been hurting us? Like… him him?” Imagine that—praying for the man who came to kill your people. Ananias was like, “Umm God, are You sure?” (Whitney’s version 😅)

But Ananias obeyed. He responded well.

He didn’t let offense cloud his obedience.

And that obedience? That response? Birthed one of the greatest apostles of all time. Paul went on to write over 70% of the New Testament. Even Peter said:

“Our dear brother Paul… wrote with the wisdom that God gave him…” – 2 Peter 3:15-16

Like—Paul was moving on a different level. But it all started with someone saying yes to God over offense. None of that happens if Ananias lets offense block obedience.

Real Love Ain’t Always Sweet

Let’s get this straight: real love isn’t always soft. Sometimes love has to be bold. Sometimes it corrects. Sometimes it sets boundaries. But at its core—it always seeks the good of the other person. Let’s get practical — If someone you love is in a burning house, you’re not gonna whisper, “Hey, sweetie, could you maybe come out?”. Nah! You’re screaming “GET OUT!” You’re gonna break doors, do whatever it takes to get them out. Because that’s real love.

Love can look like truth. Love can look like tough conversations. Love can even look like letting go. But it should never look like hate. Love is always faithful.

Don’t Let Offense Block Your Blessing

I’ll end with this: don’t let how someone treats you stop you from being who God called you to be.Don’t  let someone else’s bad behavior determine how you love . You were created to love like Jesus. And Jesus never let pain stop Him from purpose.

So friend… how you respond really matters.

Sometimes the very person who offended you is the one God wants you to bless.

Sometimes the pain is part of a redemptive story God is writing.

Sometimes your obedience in loving someone hard-to-love is what shifts everything.

So stay faithful. Stay loving. Stay rooted. Choose love every time—even when it hurts, even when it’s hard, even when it doesn’t make sense. Because…

“If I have not love, I am nothing.” – 1 Corinthians 13:2

Born to love like my Savior does.

The Girl with the Biggest Heart

🎶 Music Time, Fam! 🎶

Need a track that’ll make you want to worship AND crush it at the gym? 👊🏽🔥

Marcus Rogers’ “Throw in the Towel” is IT. You’ll be praising with passion and pushing those weights like you’re fighting demons off your destiny! 😅🙌🏽

Then switch gears and lift your heart with Tjsarx – Hallowed —a powerful anthem to glorify the One who hears and answers prayers.

It’s worship and your feet will be moving as well.